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| December 24th |
| Dreaming of a WET Christmas |
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Peter Chin sent marzipan-
How Sweet! |
It's been raining since 4 p.m., I hope Santa brought his Umbrella.
I woke up this morning feeling Zombiesque. I knew my eyes were open, but I was certain I was still asleep. My thoughts became flooded with concerns over how long they've been open. Did I just open them and not notice? Have they been open since sunrise, and now so dried up from exposure I wont be able to close them? No, that's not what I have to be depressed about today, it's something else, something I have to . . oh yes. That's it. Today is the day I teake Bang to the airport. Today is the day that code orange not-withstanding, I put Bang on a plane and jet him to Virginia to spend Christmas with his family. My head felt very heavy, and I remembered a sleeping pill I took last night, a little blue softgel with a sip of whine to help me nod off and stay off, something I haven't been doing well lately.
I could hear Bang puttering in the kitchen, preparing the coffee and the toast he makes for me daily. I dragged my feet off the bed to the floor, and craned my neck over to see what time it was. It was 7:09 a.m. and at that moment the alarm clicked off and the radio started playing NPR morning edition. I looked over to see rusty stirring under the covers.
It took me a while to wake up, I think I was behind the wheel of Bangs car and 5 miles away from the house before I actually made full conciousness, and the whole time I wondered what I'd be doing for the next 7 days. Bang has been so much of my daily grind lately that the mere thought of solitude for the next few days was more than my brain wanted to think about. Most of me was looking forward to it, and parts of me weren't. Making the best decisions on HOW to make the most of my time was the heaviest concern on my mind. I fear that the whole week will go by and I'll have nothing accomplished. It's Christmas eve, first things first. There are parties to attend, and people to see.
Tonight I will take Jay and Winslow over to Malcom's place for free food, wine and interesting silverlakers. Silverlake people are especially interesting if you've never known any lower-middle class San franciscans. Silverlakers and San Franciscans can easily be mistaken for each other with their thrift-store coútre and their design-myself-a-haircut style. Malcom is no different, nor are his friends.
I often find myself wondering what these people do for a living, and how can they do it in such a way as that they are able to maintain a look and a lifestyle that seems to define time, moving neither up or down the economic ladder.
I fantasize sometimes that thay are all incredibly independantly wealthy, and choose this look as a shabby-sheik lifestyle, other times I see them as handy-men and executive assistant women, high on life and pot, and low on ambition or aspiration. It's easy to imagine some of these people in the basement apartment of a home owned by an older adult they bear a strong resemblance to.
If I was to predict the evening fair, I would say Jay may find himself a pretty face or a bottle to make love to. Hard to say what Winslow will do. I can say what he wont do though. He won't strike a conversation with more than one person, he wont get drunk, he will not put a lampshade on his head or try in vain to be the life of the party, as much as I would like him to. No, most likely Winslow will stand in one corner, be polite, quiet and reserved, probably make himself a plate of food and never leave my side.
Malcom's apartment is tiny, I'm wondering how it will all go. I am so starved for excitement these days I don't care, and would dare to throw in a can of itching powder or army ants to spice it up a bit, just to give myself something to laugh, cry or be ashamed about in the morning. If I'm lucky some idiot will get high and try to talk to me, or better yet, MAKE A PASS and I will have some WONDERFUL banter to write about in the morning.
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| Bang- opening the distraction present while I finish wrapping the ipod that arrived a few moments ago via carrieer pigeon. |
I also suspect that, just out of habit on my way home, I will look to the sky for a sleigh and reindeer to pass overhead, as If I remember seeing something like that before. I'll remember the Christmas that the bike didn't arrive, nor did the G.I. Joe, or the Walkman, and I'll remember that Santa is very busy, and not to put my trust in an establishment that has too many people in it's ranks to be bothered with the needs of the one. It's no wonder that people don't vote, they've been told Santa doesn't exist. Regardless, we continue to hope, because right around the time we learn that Santa Clause is a lie, we also learn that the best thing about Christmas is the part where you're GIVING someone something, and you forget about what you GOT! Year after year I giggle over the thoughtful and fun things I wrapped in paper for those I love, yet I continously fail to remember what they got me. Why? Because I don't care. If no one gave me ANYTHING this Christmas I wouldn't notice. I hope it's the same for you.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year folks. More about the party tommorow.
Feedback to this article HERE
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You asked for it . . .
Me and the wireless mouse and keyboard that was at the top of my list. Now I can finally work on my blog from the bathroom.
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| December 20th |
| The Birth of MCGforce |
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 PRESS RELEASE: It's official, the MCGForce CD entitled BANG is finally available from Cafepress and ImagesEverything-Los Angeles.
Artist and musician Thomas Gaebel (aka GForce) created 6 tracks using Apple's Soundtrack v1.1 and uploaded them in mp3 format, with graphics, to the cafe press site where they are available for sample and purchase for $10 USD.
"This was a lot of fun to create" says Gforce, of his long awaited electronic debut album "and I hope everybody orders their copy in time for Christmas!"
The CD packaging is unique and interesting as well, for all images used in the cover and traycard designs were taken by the CD's namesake Bang P., on a roadtrip he and Gforce took in October of this year. The CD is a musical compilation of time spent between these two creatives over the past 4 months, and each track tells a story. Click HERE to hear samples of the tracks, and to order your copy of BANG.
Feedback to this article HERE
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The photography of CD Namesake Bang P. Adorns the CD booklet, cover and traycard, adding a very nice touch to the debut recording's packaging. |
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| December 14th |
| Home-making 101 |
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We decided we're not doing it this year, Christmas that is. No needle dropping, sap oozing tree in the living room for the cat to climb, or the dogs to pee on. No endless string of tangled lights and wires and staples and Garland(sorry, I'm gay and required to capitalize that word) Hell, I'm not even sending out any cards.
It was such a relief the other day when on the way to a dinner party, Bang asked me if the Christmas party we were tentatively going to throw on the 20th was a "Go".
"I'm not really into it this year" I said, You're leaving on Christmas eve, Jays going Christmas day . . " "Oh thank God!" He said, "I'm not into it either". So we'll settle for a festive New Years and take the season off. That's best I think.
As far as resolutions go, I have a big one, and it's going to be seriously incorporated into my life, so it should be easy to pull off- I'm starting a savings plan.
This savings plan is gong to be aggressive, with a serious attempt to cut deeply into my current comfort zone, so the whole thing can be EXPERIENCED.
This project plan is for one year, includes cutting out excesses, taking in a roommate and combining financial forces to pull off a major cash coup of the grandest kind.
I'm excited about the financial possibilities, and more than that, about finding ways to push myself, learning how to live with someone again, after living here alone for 2 years.
I know that doesn't sound like much, but it's quite a stretch for somebody like me, who gets deeply rooted in his routines, and starts squirming at the mere mention of "compromise".
The reasoning I'm touting this time, for all those who know me and are shaking their heads at my "serial relationship M.O.'" -it's business!
Yes, I'll say it, Bang and I are going to be shacking up, after a mere 6 months of dating, but we have some reasons that have nothing to do with the concept of "We Are So In Love", in fact, I don't think either of us has even stated that idea.
No, Bang and I came to the same conclusions on the subject of home-ownership- We're Not Going to Get There Alone-
Living alone in Los Angeles is very much a practice in hand-to-mouth, and everyone I know that has "made it" in the home-buying market has done so in one of three ways.
How to Buy a Home In Los Angeles:
1. Inheritance=downpayment
Face it, without that 10% down, you're not even getting started- and with the average shack landing in the price-range between 350-500k, you need at least $20,000 to get any mortgage brokers attention. One big chunk of change from a generous parent, or worse, one that had a life insurance policy with you listed as the benefactor, can have no better placement than in your biggest investment challenge. It a hell of a swap, trading in your parents for a house, but it's a nice way to sustain the memories.
I know one sweet couple in west Los Angeles who lost their folks within months of each other, and bought a nice 4 bedroom within the year.
2. Live free or forget it- I happen to know at least three couples that found a free housing experience for at least a year, and put all their nickels into a jar until they had enough saved for that trip to the real-estate office. One couple in San Diego lives in a brothers garage attic apartment, so did another het couple in San Rafael. The key was to cut out one of their biggest expenses, and use the money saved for one dream purpose. It's not as easy, or as hard as it sounds. You give up a lot of rights when you stop paying for you're roof. I know a couple in the west indies who have lived on a small Island for five years, and saved up over a million dollars for their future. Whether the sacrifice was worth they will tell you, is debatable.
3. Just Do It- This is the simplest way to buy a house. Save your Money, make a downpayment, buy it, move in, end of story. It's also the hardest.
I don't know a lot of people who have so much of a disposeable income that putting thousands of dollars away at a faster rate than the rising housing market, but I have seen it done, recently. This wise couple, close friends of mine, started out right.
J and A went about it all the right ways. Each had a substantial savings plan of their own established before they met. J works very hard (nights and weekends) and has sucessfully climbed the power ladder for the past several years with relentless ambition. A has held a steady job for a trusted company for several years and has held a strong arm against racking up any seroius debt. Combined, their credit is impeccable, and they had a little help from J's company with the closing costs, which he worked into a pre-nuptual contract with his current employer.
Of these three options, Bang and I agreed that the best way for us to do this, is a little bit of #2, and a lot of #3. We're going to cut our housing costs to as small a nut as possible, and hope we can put it away faster than the rise of the market.
With our current plan, not counting surpluses from freelance work, but counting for every penny of possible disasters, we expect to packaway at least 20K. Not a bad nut to start with, but the only way to do it, we both agreed, is to combine forces, and cut the overhead. So, for this expected goal, Band is moving in with me at Silver Ridge.
All of this will be taking place a few months from now, as we go through several domestic "test runs" to make sure our compatability quotient is stable enough to withstand the strain of "The Big Sacrafices"
So far, so good. Wish us luck, I will keep you updated mon thly on how this project progresses. Were calluing it "The Tommmy/Bang finance project 2004" .
If we're both too naive to see the forest for the trees, and the project dies early, or fails miserably, at least we'll have MONEY in the bank to make us feel better. Regarless, it's another learning opportunity, and if you have any ideas on a faster way, or more efficient way to make this all possible, let me know,
Feedback to this article HERE
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NOTE: If you read, won't you please consider writing something in my guestbook a s a way of saying " I was Here!" ? I would really appreciate knowing if anyone reads this sh*t.
We're into the month of December, and I'm reminded how much I always disliked Christmas. Always seemed so surreal to me, the decor and the cheer and all, and how it all seemed to change the day after. I recall loading up a christmas list with great ideas for myself, and finding most, if not all my gifts mislabeled and given to my undeserving, unimaginative brother. He, on the other hand consistentantly asked for a G.I. Joe doll eight years running and never recieved so much as a stretch armstrong. Mom didn't like the idea of her son playing "soldier" which seemed a little ungrateful, seeing as Dad worked full time for the National Guard. Dad didn't put up a fuss though, he didn't like the idea of his youngest son playing with dolls.
The picture above was taken from Xmas 1975 when Mom and Dad were out of town and my Brother Timmy and I were huddled over to Uncle Will and Aunt Ginny's house for a night. All I remember is wetting the bed, and getting spanked with an incredibly large wooden spoon that they kept hanging on the wall next to an equally large wooden fork.
I thought the idea of hanging your flatware on the wall seemed unsanitary, and I recall getting into a heated debate with Aunt Ginnie over it. She insisted it was fine, but I pointed out the research that showed wooden utensils were havens for bacteria. It was no wonder that later in the evening she chose the afore-mentioned flatware as her instrument of justice for staining her guestrooms brand-new posture-pedic. I suppose I deserved it.
Before we get too close to the "season", i thought I would take a moment to unkindly vent about some of the idiots that happen to have my phone number. This is a rant, and within the trappings of the next few paragraphs I will try to make my observations as amuzing as possible, but please keep in mind that I write best when I'm pissed. You will see a surge of activity on these pages after the Christmas season.
I had decided at the end of October that I wouldn't be doing any more free work for anybody. Currently HALF the work on my desk today is pro-bono, and it is eating up a great deal of my time. I did a little math and it turns out that if all the graphically needy moochers currently feeding on my talent were actually paying me for my work, I would breach the 50k mark in 2003. That's some pretty sad news. As soon as I picked myself off the floor from wreeling in the whirlwind of that epiphany, I got a phone call. This call came from a person who often calls with awsome opportunities for me that never pan out. The cable company that is a friend of his brother in-law, the Law firm that he hired to sue his landlord that also needs a corporate image site, the list goes on. I have recently marked a note on this guys info in my palm as "A total and complete waste of precious time".
The conversation went something like this . . .
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Me: Hey michael, What's up?
MC: Thomas- I have a favor to ask of you. I'm going to be doing a website to sell christmas ornaments, and I was wondering, if I could call in a favor, that is, if I HAVE any favors to call in, I was wondering if you could build the header for me.
Me: (intentionally manufacturing uncomfortable silence)
MC:(going on) you see I have this great idea to post some vintage Christmas ornaments I have on-line, I think I could make some good money out of it and you see . . . .
Me: . . Um, I think I under . . . .
MC: I mean, I would PAY you for it if you perfer, I mean , I have SOME money, I'm waiting for a few clients to catch up with me. Last month was pretty busy, but I'm waiting for some clients to fulfill some invoices.
Me: So you want me to just make a header for your website?
MC: Yeah, I thought, you know, you're very good at what you do, and I'm not a graphic designer at ALL!
Me: Michael, let me ask you a question . . .
MC: Sure Shoot!
Me: You build websites right? I mean, all the sites I have seen that you said you do are pretty well done, I think . .
MC: Yeah . . .
Me: So what's the difference between a header done by you, and one that I might do?
MC: Well, you know, you're the designer, you have all the right tools and stuff, and I was basically looking for something that had some Christmas images on it, maybe a festive, you know, seasonal font, i dunno. . . .
Me: (re-generating awkward silence)
MC: Is this a bad time?
Me: yeah, I was just preparing some food for my family Thanksgiving Dinner, maybe you can give me a call tomorrow?
MC: You know what, you have my number, if you'd like to help me out give me a call.
Me: o.k., sure, happy thanksg . . .
MC:*hung up |
Michael's Misconceptions
Article Number 1:
I don't LIVE for graphic design work. It is a Job, not a lifestyle.
Though some dogs do live for the hunt, and certain horses get all worked up at the site of Kentucky, I use money as a motivating factor. I won't even want to talk about graphics at a dinner party unless someone stuffs a dollar bill in my pocket.
Number 2: I owe him no favors- and if I did, I would rather dig a ditch.
Number 3: That I am remotely interested in "helping him out"......
I just don't get it- what is this man thinking?
I have been mooched by the ultimate blood-sucking professionals, and this is just shoddy work. If anyone out there is considering doing a mooch job on me, Here's a MUCH better way to go about it.
1. Be prepared to pay me, you have a 50-50 chance if you do it by the book.
2.Call me up, and offer me the Job, mention there were others considered but I rose to the top, like cream.
3. Talk about your hardship-briefly
4. LOVE the work I do, GUSH, Tell me it is WAY BETTER than you expected
5. Tell EVERYONE how GREAT this work is, and how life is going to get SO GOOD now that I have brought it into existance.
6. Sit back and wait for me to tear up the invoice, which I very well may, if life has been good, and I haven't already spent the money .
At least this way you have a chance at some free work. I don't mind working for a little ass-kissing, especially if I think, while I'm working, that it's CASH I'm getting. But to just call and ask me "Please dump your business and spend your time working on my business for nothing but the gratitude I offer-if any- and the gratifying sense that you helped me out." is a little ludicrous and self -serving. O.k., I'm done ranting now.
Some gay-friendly friends of mine were in town from San Raphael over the weekend, and we all met at El Coyote for dinner and chit chat
There were 13 of us- and this included 5 married hetero-sexual couples.
I have heard a lot of ranting lately about the prolifery of gays in mainstream society, but I'm a little put off by how many heteros are emerging in my world as of late.
It used to be that I only had to provide clever conversation to the newlyweds when they were members of my family, and usually only at holiday gatherings. Now it seems all those people, the ones that were straight, but had gay friends, the fag hags and the hanger-onners are pairing up and getting married. Several of the couples at the party were once SINGLES and attending My parties which were then overtly gay.
One Gay couple even brought his STRAIGHT PARENTS to the dinner!
Silverlake, my neighborhood, used to be FROTHING with fags, it was considered EAST HOLLYWOOD and all the queers who never felt like they fit in in weho came here.
Now, Silverlake is so trendy that Heteros are buying up all the real estate. Starbucks has a line out the door on Saturday mornings that used to be contrived of Leather Daddies, Clone-fags, Goths and Grunges. Now it's Mom's and Dad's with strollers and the grocery store looks like a scene from 30-something. I'm praying to God Silverlake doesn't end up like Pasadena!
Seems I can't swing a dead cat without hitting a hetero these days, and I'm running out of dead cats!
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